Tweeter and the Govnor Man


There might be an explanation, after all. 

This weekend, we’ve been given evidence that the root of the insanity that Donald Trump suffers from might be contagious.

How else to explain these past couple of days?  First, let’s take a look at the latest example of the insanity that our reality TV star in chief is afflicted with.

In mid-December, a week before Christmas and a day after he said he’d sign a budget bill, our little orange bundle of joy threw a temper tantrum, and instead decided to shut down the government until he got his wall built. It turned into the longest shut-down in history, until he caved in, doing double takes and nervous  glances over his shoulder in fear of that notorious playground bully, Nancy Pelosi.

So a week later, here he was again, threatening another tantrum if he doesn’t get funding for the wall he saw in the “Oligarchs ‘R Us” Christmas Catalog. (I suspect what he actually wants is the old “Fort Apache” play set from when he was a kid – in fact, for only $90  on e-Bay, we could get him a vintage copy of the original thing right here: https://www.ebay.com/i/192677456920?chn=ps   Perhaps this would turn out to be his “Rosebud”). He says he is going to shut the government down again or unleash plans the executive branch has prepared for declaring a state of emergency, never minding that if something can be scheduled, it can’t really be considered an emergency.

But then, last Friday, Trump insisted that all this time, workers have not only started on building the wall but are “almost finished.” When asked about the funding he needs to complete the wall, he said, “oh, we’ve got money.”

????

First of all, he can’t tell us where this wall is being built or by who.  Nobody who lives near the border has been found who’s actually seen these mysterious wall building people. But if any of this is true, why did we just suffer through a government shutdown to get a wall built, and why will we need another one or a state of emergency to finish it?

Never mind the questions about why anyone would contradict himself so quickly and  completely, or whether he believes these wall-building fairies actually exist or not. We’ve all gotten used to it.  It’s just “Trump being Trump”, which translates to English as, “the man is bat-shit crazy.”

But just when we’re getting used to all of this, the Democrat Governor of Virginia gives evidence that he’s been eating out of the same bowl of Fruit Loops as Trump. A photograph of two people, one in black-face and one wearing a KKK costume, and the story that one of them is the gov, surfaces on his page in his Medical School yearbook from 1984 (when he was 25 years old), which made me ask, they have yearbooks for Med School?  Then they showed the picture and offensive as it sounded, seen, it was much worse.

Then came the admission from the gov that yes, one of those two individuals in the photo is in fact him, followed by the usual bullshit apologies about how that doesn’t reflect who he is now, and how much he hopes we can all learn, and bla bla bla.. The usual crap one spews when he is busted. It also becomes clear that he has no intention of resigning, even though the number of people calling on him to do so starts rising as the story gains momentum.

Saturday comes and the pressure is rising, and he announces he is going to make a statement and take questions that afternoon. Okay, we all thought, he’s thought about it and he’s going to do he only thing he really can do, he’s going to resign.

This is where things get interesting.  This is the point where it becomes apparent that the Trump bats have also shit in the gov’s otherwise empty brain.

At the press conference, with his poor wife playing the clichéd role of the stoic and suffering partner, he offers that he has become “convinced” that neither individual in the photograph was him. When asked to explain, he says he’s never worn a KKK costume in his life.  Then, when asked if he’d ever worn blackface, he admits, yes, but only once, and not in the photo.  When asked when that time was, he says it was during a dance contest, also in 1984, and that he wore blackface as part of a Michael Jackson costume. At this point, and this was my personal favorite moment of the whole weekend, a reporter asks him if he can still moon walk. A slight smile begins to form in the corners of the gov’s mouth, and I swear I could hear the bass rift to “Billie Jean” in my head as he was going to break into dance, when the stoic and suffering Mrs. Gov interrupts, saying that it would be “inappropriate at this time.” It is a wonderfully surreal moment that any man who’s ever been married can relate to – the time your wife saved you from your own judgment and prevented you from making an even bigger ass of yourself.

That moment also reveals the depths of just how clueless this guy is, as he actually thought the press conference and the denial of what he said less than fifteen hours earlier was true would save his job. He not only thought that wearing blackface as part of a Michael Jackson costume wasn’t racist, but that doing a moonwalk during the press conference would somehow absolve him of the reprehensible racism that was so painfully evident in every word he said, in every self-contradiction he pushed forward, and in every nonsense hypothetical he advanced (He explained there were a number of photos that showed up on the wrong page in the yearbook because a staff was sitting around with a whole bunch of photos on a table while preparing the yearbook, and that there were lots of photos of other guys in blackface … never mind)

The gov had to be disappointed in the resulting unanimity of the condemnation against him, and the unanimity of the calls for his resignation, including tweets from none other than the Tweeter in Chief himself.  I agree. The gov, like the tweeter, is too incompetent to lead a boy scout troop, let alone a state or a nation.

How can one lead when he displays such hatred for a segment of the population he is supposed to represent?  How can he effectively lead when he is caught in so many open and bald faced lies? How can anyone NOT call for such a leader to step aside or, if he won’t, to be removed from office?

It’s time to start boycotting Fruit Loops, or at least quit feeding them to bats …

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